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Mom and I had a long discussion today about “forgive and forget“. This is something that has been eating at me going on seven months now. I cannot count the numbers of tears shed, hurt, aggrivation and anger. My wonderful husband has held my hand through all of it, let me cry in his arms and rant till I collaspe from exhaustion. Too many times Bill’s caught me in a full redhead wrath one minute and bawling the next over the situation. 

Underneath the negitives I still seem to have a deep need to “fix” things. Unfortunately my version of “fix”ing things is more psychologically based (I am a part of the “therapist generation” afterall) and when I “gear up” for battle I go through a prep worthy of any courtroom. I like facts, like like quoting, I like evidence. I like winning/being right (should have been a lawyer).

I’ve come face to face with a point where that even though I know differently, have the evidence, and have plenty in my favor, a fight isn’t going to accomplish anything. As my Mom says “sometimes it’s just best to put a bandage on it and move on” (aka not discuss why you were hurt, why you hurt them, etc…) In alot of ways I completely disagree with this, at the same time fighting isn’t going to accomplish anything in some situations. Especially when it involves more people than just the two that are at major odds. It has a tidal wave of distruction and in as much as I disagree with Mom’s theory, I’m going to work to make it work.

I found myself at that place mixed with hurt, tears and anger tonight once again and was driven to find some comfort and backup (so to speak) from the Bible. I found the following:

Ephesians 4:31-32 (KJV)

 31Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice:  32And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.

Comes down to a simple point, in the grand scheme of things what goes on here on earth is miniscule between our interactons with each other when we discuss forgiveness. Opposed to what God has forgiven us for.  Sometimes all we can do to try to start the healing and fix the hurt that we have inflicted, that has been inflicted upon us, and the effects it has had on those around us is to “put a bandage on it”.